"Don't Untie the Tie That Binds"

This week all eyes were on GodTV to listen to Wendy Alec tell the story of a Jezebel stealing her husband Rory away from her. One facebook friend identified the other woman as jazz singer Carola Caye who reportedly “says Rory Alec is supposed to be her husband, not Wendy's.”

Certainly men in Christian leadership are targeted by the enemy more than the average Joe sitting in the pew. Pastors particularly are appealing to women in the church as the personification of their ideal man. 

I recall several years ago, a pastoral son of a famous preacher got a divorce from his wife, the mother of his five children. I heard from a friend who attended his church that the single women in the congregation were beating a path to his bachelor pad door. If a pastor happens to outlive his wife, the potential wives in the church rush to take a number.

Many Christian leaders have fallen prey to adultery, divorce and remarriage. But woe to the seductress that successfully lures such a man away from his wife. The very traits of the pastor that she fell in love with -- his spirituality, his godliness, his understanding of the Word -- all those things he throws away when he leaves his wife for you. He is no longer that godly man that appealed to you. Rory’s new woman will soon find that out. And she is fooling herself if she thinks he will be a faithful husband to her.

Some women might admire a Christian leader from afar, even praying that God release him from his unfit wife, in the hopes that she can be waiting in the wings to snag him quickly ahead of the other desperate would-be housewives. But holding onto such a hope -- even praying such -- can become overpowering -- and women must get power over it. If you covet another woman’s husband, can God bless that? Remember, if you win -- you lose!

Another mistake single female believers make is what is known as “missionary dating.” I’m shocked to meet women in the church who yoked themselves unevenly with a non-believer thinking she could convert him - but what ends up happening is that he drags the woman down to his level and comes between her and her LORD. 

There’s a passage in Isaiah 4:1 that reminds me of the situation in the church today:

“And in that day seven women shall take hold of one man, saying,
“We will eat our own food and wear our own apparel;
Only let us be called by your name,
To take away our reproach.”

For every single man in the church today, there are probably seven women. Being single is not the worst thing that can happen to you. Marrying the wrong man is far worse. Be at peace with your singleness until the LORD shows you otherwise. Watch over your heart -- falling for a married man is a snare to your soul.

Yet you say, “For what reason?”
Because the LORD has been witness
Between you and the wife of your youth,
With whom you have dealt treacherously;
Yet she is your companion
And your wife by covenant.
But did He not make them one,
Having a remnant of the Spirit?
And why one?
He seeks godly offspring.
Therefore take heed to your spirit,
And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.
For the LORD God of Israel says
That He hates divorce,
For it covers one’s garment with violence,”
Says the LORD of hosts.
“Therefore take heed to your spirit,
That you do not deal treacherously.”
1 Mal 14-16